Independent Press

Colin Kaepernick Takes Both Knees in General

By |September 17th, 2017

He sucks, in other words. Taking a knee is an attack on unity. That's what anthems are supposed to do: celebrate the unity of a people. The insidious aspect to virtue-signalling is best explained in how children whom are constantly being told they are bad, defective, inadequate, unlovable take that with them for the rest of their lives. Now this narrative, taken on a national scale, teaches children we should be ashamed of the anthem that brings this nation together because the author, Francis Scott Key, was a flawed man.

Sleepless Jeff Bezos Still Has Millions of “What Happened” 1 Star Reviews to Delete

By |September 15th, 2017

A sleepless Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos, distraught over the poor reception of Hillary Clinton's latest book, has gone six days without batting an eye in a desperate effort to delete millions of one star reviews of Clinton's latest book What Happened. He is also in a lot of pain from the carpel tunnel syndrome he has from repeatedly hitting the delete key hundreds of thousands of times.

Haitian Economy Rebounds as Hillary Orders 63 Million Voodoo Dolls to Kill Trump Voters

By |September 14th, 2017

In her new memoir What Happened, Hillary Clinton writes that "I was tempted to make voodoo dolls of certain members of the press and Congress and stick them full of pins." However, while making the rounds and finding herself more unpopular among Democrats and progressives in her Blame Everyone Tour, she has decided to use the proceeds from the Clinton Foundation to redeem herself, and plans to reboot the Haitian economy. She has ordered 63 million voodoo dolls custom made for each individual Trump voter.

Local Woman Happy as Fuck She Caused Hillary to Lose

By |September 14th, 2017

Linda V. Clemmons, 24, admitted today that her refusing to vote in 2016 was "the key reason Hillary Clinton got her ass handed to her on a platter" in the presidential election and that it makes her "happy as a fucking clam that she lost."

#FBIAnon – Awon Cut A Deal and Will Sell Out DWS/Schumer/Schiff

By |September 11th, 2017

VL was contacted a couple of hours ago via email asking to convey the following message and we agreed. I have included a True Pundit link for more information. Prayers for Florida - May God protect all those that decided to stay.

Uranium One Precursor: 9/11 American Holocaust, Irrefutable Nuclear Event

By |September 11th, 2017

"The file included documentation of a 2003 preliminary report on 9/11 which identified the event as a nuclear demolition on behalf of a terrorist organization that had accessed nuclear material from US stockpiles though Israeli penetration of the Department of Energy. It further alleged that the Department of Homeland Security had been established to manage the coverup and silence whistleblowers."

It’s All Over!

By |September 10th, 2017

PewDiePie on celebrity use of natural disasters to promote themselves or a political agenda.

World Peace at Hand: UN Security Council Institutes Like, Dislike Button

By |September 7th, 2017

The United Nations Security Council has introduced a new means to ensure, at long last, world peace. "They are like UN non-binding resolutions, only more bad ass. No self-respecting nation wants to wake up to a depressing number of likes due to war crimes."

Inspiring! $2,500 Service to Avoid Hillary Book Tour a Smash Hit

By |September 3rd, 2017

Let's face it, she's everywhere, but for only $2,500 you can spend several days in an isolation chamber away from Hillary Clinton during her book tour. An ingenious entrepreneur has created Cankles Away, a new service that guarantees you will avoid any news of, or audience with Hillary Clinton during her "What Happened" Blame Everybody book tour. Part of the fee pays for hotel accommodations, and the removal and jamming of all electronic devices to keep clients blissfully unaware of the cult media following the failed presidential candidate.